ramblings, random musings, fascinations, rants, raves and revelations

It has been going on for quite so long now. I really can’t get a good sleep. I already have signed “written warning” escalation from work because of tardiness. I tried reading books but I can’t understand any. I tried taking some meds but hell-what-the-hell, really no effect!

After all desperate attempts and bugging H about my ordeal, he suggested that I come over his place and watch DVD with his all caps - JUST STOP TEXTING! I was reluctant to watch the movie - The Bucket List at first. Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman sounded quite boring and too melodramatic for my ears. H insisted and demanded a review here. With so much love, I obliged [hehehe].

The movie operates on the hope that two beloved stars rubbing their signature screen personas together can spark warm, fuzzy box office magic. I didn’t count on it. Stars or no, it is an open question whether audiences will flock to a preposterous, putatively heartwarming buddy comedy about two men diagnosed with terminal cancer living it up in their final months.

Sitting atop of one of the Egyptian pyramids, Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman as terminally ill cancer patients, engage in a sentimental philosophical chat about life and loss. The two have decided to travel around the globe, doing whatever the heck they want; they can afford it since the Nicholson character is a billionaire CEO. The first thing to say about The Bucket List is that Rob Reiner is the rare director who can take all the wonder out of one of the seven wonders of the world. The way that the pyramid they’re sitting on is lit and shot, it looks completely fake, and the one in the distance could be a rear-projection backdrop. The second thing to observe is that the conversation might be taking place almost anywhere — in a coffee shop, say, or back in the dingy hospital room where Nicholson, as an aging playboy with four ex-wives, and Freeman, as a mechanic who has spent his life sacrificing for his family, first met, discovered that they had absolutely nothing in common, and decided to bond over their tragic illnesses and become friends anyway.

The biggest surprise of The Bucket List is how casually it treats the whole ”bucket list” of wild-things-to-do-before-we-die concept. It’s fun, for two minutes, to see Nicholson and Freeman jumping out of a plane, but once they’ve gotten tattoos and raced vintage cars [to the cloying been-there-heard-that accompaniment of ZZ Top's ''Tush''], the movie is already scraping the bottom of the bucket. Basically, they spend the rest of the time doing disease-of-the-week buddy-movie therapy against the backdrop of world landmarks. Nicholson has the benefit of playing a rascal so self-centered he veers into unpleasantness, but Freeman, as the brilliant working-class autodidact whose one ”flaw” is that his marriage suffered from empty-nest syndrome, reminds us once again that it’s long past time this actor played someone who isn’t a saint. If he and Jack had traded roles, there might have been one thing about the drably tender Bucket List that surprised you.“The Bucket List” is rated PG-13 [Parents strongly cautioned]. It has off-color dialogue.

After the movie, H asked me… You, what’s your Bucket List? Which I replied - Don’t ask me that, lalaki lalo ulo mo.

Eto si Lanie, ang aming Call Center Manager, na very-preggy sa anak nila ni Shoti, na dati kong shota [harharhar]…

Did this for her phone’s wallpaper and friendster’s background.

Labyu Lanie! mwah! mwah!

Pasko na nga ba? Not really. I just felt it when H and I went to shop last weekend and earlier today. We bought gifts for his relatives and friends already. That is the only time I felt its already Christmas because there are so many people around doing their Christmas shopping. But other than that, wala.

I just feel sad because you cannot feel the old Christmas spirit anymore. Those times we were kids when shopping was not really important. Caroling was the main focus of kids, eagerly awaiting December 16th. I miss the old times when Christmas decorations did not consist of huge, expensive “parols” bought from Pampanga or Gilmore Street but of a simple parol made of papel de Hapon. The parol-making competition sa Baste, simbang gabi, Christmas parties and everything that is very “pasko sa Mindoro”. Christmas is so commercialized nowadays. If you don’t have enough money, your Christmas is doomed. That’s the idea injected in our minds.

I noticed that in our neighborhood, only 3 houses, including ours, put up Christmas lights and parol. How sad no? When before, after November 2, decorations are in full swing already. Now, it’s already November 14 and yet people are not yet in the Christmas mood.

Ask them why and only one answer will they give you…

Wala kasing pera.

Didn’t they know that with or without money we can all celebrate Christmas? It need not be an expensive celebration. We just have to go back to basic and celebrate it because of the Lord. A simple parol will do. It need not be an expensive one. Banderitas will do. And some Christmas songs blasting from the neighbor’s radio will do the trick.

Wait, come to think of it, do you hear Christmas songs being played on the radio?

Come on, let’s start spreading the Christmas spirit.

Here’s my nephew very much anticipating Christmas.

Bakit? Ano ba meron? Kailan? Hanggang? Pede ba to?

So, when you read that title, did you automatically draw a conclusion in your mind about what a “skeptic” is? Did that word have a negative or a positive connotation in your mind?

There will always be times where you’ll feel dumb, uncertain, needs confirmation, needs help. I must admit, when it first occurred to me to write about skepticism this morning, I was thinking about those people who never trust anything unless they have proof; those people who want to live in what they KNOW, not what might be possible; those people who won’t support anything new; people who are basically difficult to have a conversation with because they question the logic of every idea. For me, the word had a negative connotation.

But when I looked up the meaning of the word in my trusty dictionary.com, I found out that the definition is:

One who instinctively or habitually doubts, questions, or disagrees with assertions or generally accepted conclusions.

And I discovered that I am a skeptic.

I’ve always been a questioner. As far back as I can remember, I had to know why things were the way they were, and whether or not they had to be that way. I really don’t believe I was trying to be difficult - I was just curious.

But the older I got, the more I began to understand that questions didn’t always have answers, and the people to whom I was addressing my questions didn’t want to appear uninformed or unintelligent, so they encouraged me to stop asking questions. Whether this was in school, at work, or even at home, I remember the effect of my questions on my teachers and parents, and I remember that I slowly began to shut up - at least on the outside.

But now I wonder, where would we be in our world of science, religion, education, business without those people who “instinctively doubt, question or disagree with generally accepted conclusions”?

Maybe for me the hangup has been with the context in this definition provided by the word “habitually.” Even the “right” thing done for the “wrong” reasons is still “wrong,” right?

Was I asking questions all my life just to be difficult? Was it a habit? I don’t think so. I’d like to get beyond my own preconceived notions and concepts of what constitutes skepticism and trust my own gut and instincts. Maybe that’s why I asked other people for the answer - because I didn’t trust my own knowing. Maybe I wanted validation. Maybe I just wanted to be acknowledged. Maybe I just wanted attention. I’d like to think those reasons for being curious evolved as I evolved throughout my life.

Maybe people have to be skeptical as they’re learning things in their lives. Maybe it’s their conditioning that turns them from intuitive skeptics into habitual skeptics. Let’s not let past perceptions - others’ or our own - keep us from questioning.

So let’s get back out there and be curious. Ask questions. Challenge the status quo. But don’t be afraid to look inside yourself for the answers.

Skeptics unite!

*Sigh

Everybody’s in a pressure cabin now. Everybody’s getting too sensitive. Everybody’s freaking out of nowhere. Everybody’s just not them right now. And I understand that.

The day made me realize things. I stopped on what I was doing, breathed and decided to write.

How do you deal with misconceptions? Some days you let it slide because, well, it is afterall a misconception, and you figure, hey, they’ll figure it out eventually and if not, good riddance.

It seems directly proportionate to the amount you feel about and for someone to how much their misunderstanding of you will affect you. The more you care about them, the more you care what they think. The less you care, the less frustrated you are when they get it wrong.

I’m finding that I’ve spent the greater part of my congnizant life being misunderstood and mislabeled…from the time my parents refused to understand why I would cry for no reason and told me to simply cut it out [maybe it was in fact depression],to my adulthood and the relationships I’ve attempted to have who did not and never would have the capacity to understand someone like me.

I think that sometimes people misunderstand because to understand might cause them greater pain or confusion. I think that sometimes people misunderstand because they’re afraid to really comprehend another person or another belief or another culture or another preference. Fear can drive people to do some pretty fucked up things. Maybe misunderstanding someone is just another way to hide from that fear and from the reality it presents. It’s easier to simply misunderstand and play dumb. It’s easier to not quite get it right because to get it or someone right requires too much work.

People rebel against being misunderstood. People kick and scream and cry and suffer and fall apart. All because they are misunderstood. People act out against it, write songs and poems in protest–anything to get their misunderstood voice out there so that maybe someday someone will understand. People speak up and out in desperation, as a last ditch effort, because they have nowhere else to turn, because they have to do something. So that there’s a record of them being misunderstood and what it really all comes down to is perspective. And no perspective is a Truth.

And sometimes people blog about it. Blog about the loneliness that being misunderstood brings. About the isolation and the alienation. Even misunderstood people need the chance to be accepted and loved and understood.

Because we are different, we are misunderstood. By default, we are misunderstood. We are brought up to be misunderstood and to misunderstand. And the disconnects keep getting easier and easier to commit.

I’m feeling misunderstood and I’m blogging about it. Not to be understood. Not about which I am misunderstood. Not to be on some sort of psuedo record of being misunderstood. Blogging because it is a lonely feeling indeed even though I know I’m not the only one.

Soooo, I’ve been over-inundated with work lately and have been a poor blogger, so I will attempt to add a good bunch of fun posts for you all to enjoy. I will make every effort to avoid the computer while I’m off work, so therefore will not be enlightening you with my obscene witticisms and off-color antecdotes. Sorry…

Kiko requested for me to write something about him and Jc. I really want to but I can’t still find the right words to even start. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe. I just hope I won’t be forced to write so quick just to announce something bad as their actions insinuate. Guys, take care of your relationship.

So, here I am with all this work surrounding me, pondering how I’ve come to the place I’m currently occupying. I should really be typing my poor little fingers to the bone as I monitor agents, but I am caught up in a conversation from the other night. I have a wonderful significant other who likes to catch me unaware and pose the kind of questions that require thought and meaning to the response. It gets me every time. Yet, when responding with the same question back, the same issues are posed - not enough time to think, am I saying this correctly? what will they think when I say this? is the feeling returned?

Funny enough, the adjective used for me is “genuine”. I guess that’s a good thing. I’m genuinely a pain in the butt from time to time. I’m genuinely a good lover [insert pat on the back here] I’m genuinely a good partner. I genuinely pursue the goals I have set for myself. Oh yeah, and I’m pretty up front and speak my mind. Maybe that’s what it means. Also, what you see is what you get. I don’t spend a lot of time fakin’ it up for folks. It’s just not me and, to be honest, I’m too lazy for all that. It’s MUCH easier to be me and let you all decide for yourselves if you want to bother.

When this particular question comes into play - Why do you love me? - I froze. I saw pictures of us in an Andy Warhol-type portrait. What particular thing makes one love another person? Is it a chemical balance? Is it a response to pheromones produced by their pores that comingle with your pores that just feels so right? Is it the way they smile when they look at you that makes you feel like you’re the only person in the world and they can only smile that way because you are who you are? I have NO CLUE.

I do know that I am capable of loving, and that almost came as a shock to me since I had removed myself from that scene for a very long time. It feels great, and I’d like to believe that I have chosen someone who is very deserving of my love despite all the hardships and troubles I’m encountering. I guess time will tell how it all plays out.

Soooo, I’ve been over-inundated with work lately and have been a poor blogger, so I will attempt to add a good bunch of fun posts for you all to enjoy. I will make every effort to avoid the computer while I’m off work, so therefore will not be enlightening you with my obscene witticisms and off-color antecdotes. Sorry…

Kiko requested for me to write something about him and Jc. I really want to but I can’t still find the right words to even start. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe. I just hope I won’t be forced to write so quick just to announce something bad as their actions insinuate. Guys, take care of your relationship.

So, here I am with all this work surrounding me, pondering how I’ve come to the place I’m currently occupying. I should really be typing my poor little fingers to the bone as I monitor agents, but I am caught up in a conversation from the other night. I have a wonderful significant other who likes to catch me unaware and pose the kind of questions that require thought and meaning to the response. It gets me every time. Yet, when responding with the same question back, the same issues are posed - not enough time to think, am I saying this correctly? what will they think when I say this? is the feeling returned?

Funny enough, the adjective used for me is “genuine”. I guess that’s a good thing. I’m genuinely a pain in the butt from time to time. I’m genuinely a good lover [insert pat on the back here] I’m genuinely a good partner. I genuinely pursue the goals I have set for myself. Oh yeah, and I’m pretty up front and speak my mind. Maybe that’s what it means. Also, what you see is what you get. I don’t spend a lot of time fakin’ it up for folks. It’s just not me and, to be honest, I’m too lazy for all that. It’s MUCH easier to be me and let you all decide for yourselves if you want to bother.

When this particular question comes into play - Why do you love me? - I froze. I saw pictures of us in an Andy Warhol-type portrait. What particular thing makes one love another person? Is it a chemical balance? Is it a response to pheromones produced by their pores that comingle with your pores that just feels so right? Is it the way they smile when they look at you that makes you feel like you’re the only person in the world and they can only smile that way because you are who you are? I have NO CLUE.

I do know that I am capable of loving, and that almost came as a shock to me since I had removed myself from that scene for a very long time. It feels great, and I’d like to believe that I have chosen someone who is very deserving of my love despite all the hardships and troubles I’m encountering. I guess time will tell how it all plays out.

Would you date the exact you?

The problem with you, you always compare yourself to me. What you can do, what I can’t, What you want, what I don’t… why don’t you clone yourself and let that shitty clone be your boyfriend?

Those were the exact words. Maybe I’m really being so demanding and inconsiderate. I always make an excuse by saying, you made me to be like this. You pushed me to be like this. Blah, blah, blah…

There is a major issue, especially in the gay community, but also in the straight community. It seems that no matter who you are, you want the perfect partner? Someone who is attractive. Someone who is pleasant to be around. Intelligent. Funny. Has money and a great job. Has a sense of spiritualism. Is comfortable with himself or herself. Yes, we want the perfect partner… all of us.

I do quite a bit of chatting online in the gay chat rooms, and whenever someone starts talking about how hard it is to find the perfect guy, I try to ask the same question: Would you date yourself?

In other words, are you the perfect guy [or gal] that you always talk about wanting? Are you attractive, or do you fundamentally feel that you’re entitled to someone that is more attractive than you are? Are you pleasant to be around, or do you think you should date someone who is more pleasant than you? You say you want someone to cuddle with you on the couch, but how often do you hold your friends when they’re hurting? You want a brilliant scientist or musician, but are you brilliant? Do you want someone who is more intelligent than you? In other words, do you want the perfect partner despite the fact that you are not the perfect partner?

I would ask you this next question? I promise, it’s not a trick question. What do you offer someone who would date or marry you? Are you a good listener? Are you very attractive and good in bed? Do you have interesting and intelligent things to say? What makes you a good partner?

Now, what are the areas that make you not so great? Are these things that you can work on?

The point of this is not to berate you for aiming high; in fact, I think that’s far better than settling on someone that is not compatible with you. But I have found based on my own experience, that when I am focused wholly on my own pain, I cannot focus on the pain of others. When I am focused on others, that is when I can see the world focusing back on me, and I find I think about myself even less when I am happy.

So I propose this challenge to you: Make a list of all those things that you want in your partner, and then BE those things. Often, we want our partners to have characteristics that we lack ourselves so that we feel like a whole person when we’re with him or her. If, however, we are all the things that we want in a partner, then we can focus on whether or not we simply like the person that we’re interested in rather than trying to get a resume of traits and experience that we can proud of in them.

You see, I am a whole person, with or without a relationship. So are you! Do you believe that? It’s true. You are a whole person even outside a relationship. If you can take the time to focus on improving and loving yourself, then you will not be so obsessed over when you will find a boyfriend, girlfriend, significant other, husband, or wife. You will be happy in the moment. You will be happy with yourself.

I proposed a challenge above. I hope you will take me up on it. Make that list and be brave in making it! If you want a supermodel, then write it down. A college professor. Someone who listens. Then write it down, and be all those things. We learn from quantum physics [I think] that like energy attracts like energy. Although we have always heard that opposites attract, often that is not the case! Attractive people tend to end up with other attractive people. Educated people tend to have relationships with other educated people. Weak spiritual people are often with other weak spiritual people. That is why I have said it is so important to be the person you would want to date.

You will never be perfect; no one is. And that’s a good thing because you will always have room for improvement. Use that as an opportunity to continue to grow, and when you have grown enough, that special someone who has also been growing might show up in your life. Then you can have that fantastic relationship. Until then, use your time wisely rather than wallowing in pain from loneliness.

Sorry Beb. Mwah!

Before coming to work yesterday, I asked H to join me for coffee. While enjoying our usual bantering, a very familiar woman with 2 kids approached us asking for alms. The usual “we ran out of money and now I don’t have enough to pay for our fare to Bulacan” spiel went. I wasn’t really in the mood to say also my usual “ilang buwan na kayo humihingi niyan ah, di parin kayo nakakauwi?” counter spiel so I just told her “naku Manang pasensiya wala din”.

When the woman went away, H quipped “di ka na naawa, kahit 5 lang sana binigyan natin, nakabili nga tayo ng ganito eh”, I just shrugged my shoulder and gestured “sorry”.

Should I feel guilty because I bought and consumed the drink, which is worth P180, when I could have just given a part of that amount to the poor woman asking for alms? Should I feel guilty that I have the time to spare to drink such expensive drinks when those who’re not so fortunate, had to work to the bone to find something to eat?

I think ads for charity are all too good eliciting that guilt feelings from us, so that we would donate to their foundations or fund-raising events. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with giving to the needy, but if we’re going to eradicate poverty, we should begin with eradicating the mentality of dependence.

And for such a reason, I prefer to give alms to street kids who’re selling flowers, or candies, buying their merchandise and giving an extra tip if they’re courteous than to those who beat at the car window asking for some coins. I prefer that those who’re asking for loans from me to do something reasonable for me in exchange of the money instead.

As a matter of fact, I’ve never believed in equal distribution of wealth. I find it a devolution of our value of giving rewards based on merit, shifting to a value of giving rewards based on need. I think what we should be propagating is a mindset that one should not get more because he needs more or that he has less than others, but rather, he will get what is due to him because of what work he had done.

But what about the poor? [I am too] How can they get out of poverty if we will not help? I think in this part, we would all be better off we’re to concentrate on generating more jobs that are parallel to one’s available skills, instead of using up resources for short-term solutions.

And I hope most people would be more like those people working even if it doesn’t pay that well. These are the people who will not demand things just because they have less, but rather, will work to make themselves worthy of what it is that they ask. This is the kind of attitude that all of us should have and it is the attitude that will get us out of being one of the impoverished nations in the world.

To H, I’m really sorry if you think I’ve been selfish but there are things in this world that need to be taught and be realized. There are things that need a different attention rather than just directly giving them what they think they lack. Many of these people take advantage of the term “mahirap ako eh”. Being mahirap doesn’t mean you’re hopeless. Being mahirap doesn’t mean you can always just make kalabit to people and say “PENGE”.

Araguuyy…

If you’ve ever had an ingrown toenail that got infected, you know how painful I’m feeling now. Some people are more prone to having ingrown nails than others and it can become quite a problem. I already had 2 operations because of this. Unfortunately, there isn’t a lot that can be done for this other than actually removing the nail.

I had this problem on the big toe of both feet. In one urgent care clinic, the doctor tried to remove part of the toenail on one foot and the whole experience was horrendously painful - and unsuccessful. After some incompetent treatment, I finally got to see a podiatrist who removed both toe’s nails and has never had a problem since.

When the nail is removed, some podiatrists and surgeons remove only part of it, the part that edges along each side and part of the matrix [root], while others remove the whole nail and root. The problem with removing the whole nail and root is that the toe bed no longer has the nail for protection.

The most painful part? Anaesthesia wears off even before the whole process is finished. Geee, I can’t imagine the pain I have to go through again. I hope it won’t be that bad. Please don’t. Huhuhu.

I still have 2 kulanis [lymph gland] sa singit to think of. Talking about pain. Huhuhu.

I had a WTF moment earlier. It was a dreary Monday. Everything just went wrong. I thought I’ll be spared from the venom, in a surprising instant, the proverbial chair was pulled out from under me. So I decided I need a t-shirt that says “WHAT THE FUCK” and a cute zip up hoodie to go over it. Then when I have these moments, I could just unzip the hoodie, exposing the shirt and appropriate sentiment. I often wish I could create such moments for myself at time when someone completely confuses me [happening a bit too frequently lately]. I would just unzip, sentiment expressed, and situation dealt with. Because, seriously, what the fuck.

That’s you Evette! Laglag Queen! I love you!

I’ve been itching to write, but a wonderful internet glitch has kept me away from accessing my site to update it…or to even just view it. But I’m here again.

Well, now I’m in information-overload mode and don’t know what to say.

1) My sleep schedule is horrific. I’m desperately trying to get myself back on track. It isn’t easy.

2) I’m eagerly waiting for the arrival of November 15. The time when everything’s gonna be over. With that, I meant everything bad, and that may include some people.

3) I have a big decision to make. I need to decide if I’ll be moving in with H or just let him leave me because we can’t be together. We’re supposed to have a vacation too. I think I need it. Badly.

4) My 10-year reunion is coming up. That’s depressing. It makes me feel really, really old. I’m too hip and cute to feel really old.

5) I watched Heroes last night. I don’t know. I LOVE this series, but right now, things seem so disjointed, I’m just not sure what to think.

6) I’ve developed new music obsessions. This is dangerous. It means I have to listen to each song over and over again until I know all the lyrics. Now I just need a mic.

7) Some things in my life really don’t make sense. Confusion is an interesting addiction. I’d rather be a bit confused and content than sure of something and not.

I like lists. I make them all the time. I like checking things off, getting this done. Sadly, my to-do list right now is WAY too long. I don’t feel like I’m ever in control.

9) I want a Kitchen-Aid mixer so I can make a Bailey’s ice cream and pair it with some delicious chocolate cake thing. That means I’ll have to invite people over to share with me.

10) And to conclude, I am about to confront a good friend who’s been trying to take away my boyfriend. Why can’t you just be happy for me? You think I wouldn’t know?

Over the last few days I realized how many things in my day-to-day life are habits. I think we create habits to help us feel safe: we take the same route to work; we shampoo, condition, and wash in the shower in the same order every day; we check certain websites with an eerie regularity. It’s harder to break some habits than others and we find that stepping out of our comfort zone in extreme ways may cause us great anxiety. All the more reason to push ourselves to do away with such habits. I could easily make a long list of those I want to break and ones I want to create. Some habits I have decided to give up and replace with new ones. Actually, I think I’m developing a new habit. I’m a bit scared by it, and I had initially decided it was probably one I shouldn’t adopt so quickly. But sometimes, you need new habits to replace old ones. And other times, you realize that a habit is good for you.

For the next few days I’ll be assessing myself and jot down these habits. Another post will be created for this. Maybe you can also create yours?

As I was checking all my messages and new pictures my Boss posted, I received an email -

“I just had a knock down with my boss. Not sure what what will happen.”

After reading the e-mail from my friend, I immediately picked up my cell phone and punched in his number.
I completely disregarded the pleasantries: “What the heck happened?” I asked.
“I lost my patience,” she replied.

That made me laugh, since she has the patience of a saint. This is a woman who takes care of her aging mother, her aging husband and everyone else around her, including people not related by blood.
It took little coaxing to get the full story.

Her supervisor gave her a task, she made the assignment to a staff member and apparently it did not meet her supervisor’s standards. So she was sent an e-mail, badly worded and ill-timed, to share the displeasure.
At a time when workers in almost every industry are being asked to do more with less, this seems like a less than effective way to manage — much less lead — a company. But this is pretty routine for her boss.
My friend has had the same boss with the same “tone” for years. And I’d been listening to her complaints about it since she took the job.

So I asked again, “Really, what the heck happened?”

Long story short, after dealing with a manpower shortage, equipment failures and a series of personnel issues in her small department, my normally quiet, hyper-responsible friend decided to call her boss on the “tone” issue — and more.

The behind-closed-doors conversation degenerated from bad to worse, ending with both of them angrier than they started.

I must admit I was sympathetic, having had my own run-ins with that personality type before. You know the kind I’m talking about. In an article I’ve read, the author called them “naysayers”, because they find fault in everything you do. There was this insecure superior before who would make stories, do everything he could to stop my growth [promotion] or even simple endorsements so that I’ll have better position in the company. I don’t what was his problem. Di naman daw siya bading, or because burog burog mukha niya, or because feeling niya mas magaling kasi siya sa graphics or what? I really don’t know. He’s got what he deserved naman. Na-karma?

They’re like speeding trains careening wildly through the room waiting for something — or someone — to run over with their negativity. The words, “Thank you”, don’t exist in their vocabulary, because then they’d have to admit your work was valuable.And that just wouldn’t do.

But I still didn’t understand: “Why now?” I asked.
“I’ve just had enough,” she replied.

I didn’t know what else to say. She has a point, and apparently she’d reached it. And, having listened to her over the years, it made me wonder why it had taken so long.

I mean, in the workplace when you’re being shot down routinely by negativity, at what point do you say, “Enough is enough?”

Good thing I sooo love my Boss that I couldn’t even think of reasons to complain.

I received this from Kuya Robert [one of our IT person]. Although I really don’t know if there’s something behind it or if there’s a different message aside from the “supposed intention”, I appreciated it.

Many people hold tension in their necks and shoulders, leading to stiffness, bad posture and tension headaches. If you want another way to do it, repeating these five yoga Neck Exercises eases tension, increases flexibility and tones the muscles. Do them slowly and keep your spine straight. Your neck relaxed and your shoulders facing forward. First drop your head back, then drop it right forward. Now keeping your head erect, turn it all the way to the right, back to center, then all the way to the left. Next drop your head forward and roll it around as wide a circle as possible. Repeat in the opposite direction. Now, raise your right shoulder, then drop it down. Repeat with the left. Lastly, raise both shoulders at once, then drop them down again.

• Bend your head forward, chin on chest, then back to original position.
• Bend to the right, then back to the original position.
• Bend backward, then back to the original position.
• Bend to the left, then back to the original position.
• Bend forward, chin on chest, move from right to the left, then move from left to right.

Way to go Kuya Robert!

I made “palahaw” last Saturday. I was hurt, saddened, devastated and all. The brother I was sending to college got her GF pregnant. Didn’t know it’s gonna hurt that much. It’s been quite a while I cried.

I felt the whole world crushing on my shoulders. I have been into a lot of problems for the past months. One after another, one after another. I have my own struggles. I wish I have a choice. I wish I could say “taym pers” but no, I’m not just playing “saksak puso” this time. This is true life. I’m dealing about life.

“I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” - Jimmy Dean

Just when we thought that everything is going as planned, life throws us a curveball that leaves both of us badly shaken. After getting over my initial shock, I know that it was up to me to decide how we’re going to deal with this challenge. We can take it negatively and consider it a problem or look at it positively as an opportunity. We choose the latter.

Life is unpredictable and maybe curve balls are thrown our way to keep us on our toes all the time. To train ourselves to be flexible, to teach us to let go when things don’t go your way, and more importantly to teach us not to avoid the curve balls but to grab a mitt and try to catch it instead.

Earlier, the GF was thrown out of their place and will be joining my brother tomorrow. He was so worried and kept on texting my sister for help. He wasn’t texting me. Maybe because he knows how i’m feeling and how deeply affected I am. I don’t want to initiate and just give him the rope to save him but I know sooner I will. I wanna give him the lesson of a curve ball. I can’t just provide him the mitt.

Life. *Sigh.

I commented on a photo done by Ash Castro [a very good photographer and artist I really admire] and as I wait for his response, I felt the need to go to the restroom. For the most part, trips to the bathroom are uneventful. That is, people go in and take care of their personal business and leave, hopefully washing their hands on the way out. Today was a bang up day for restroom weirdness at the office. I observed two uncommon behaviors while taking care of my own business.

I know I should have fully minded my own business but I think this will also help us gain another thought on our day to day lives. Tell me if you feel it offensive though.

As a general rule, there are certain rules of etiquette when you’re standing at a urinal. One of those rules is that you aren’t supposed to pay attention to the gentlemen standing at the other urinals. Under no circumstances are you to speak to them. Acceptable behaviors would include reading [if there’s a newspaper tacked to the wall], spelling your name as if the bowl were full of snow, gazing down at the distorted reflection of your face in the urinal valve, or possibly even whistling. I’ve seen some pretty disturbing feats performed in the restroom before, but today’s incident takes the cake.

Peripheral vision is one of those things that comes naturally to many. Though partially obscured by the urinal dividers, my eyes were privy to a display that I had never seen at set of office urinals before. Without turning to look I probably would have dismissed what I had seen out the corner of my left eye, except I heard something that confirmed what I thought I had seen. I heard a rhythmic sound emanating from the next urinal stall over. It was continuous in nature and almost vicious at times, and it continued for the duration of my standing there.

The man — standing at the urinal — was brushing his teeth with his right hand, no doubt while holding onto his member with the other.

Now I’ve seen people come into the restroom and brush their teeth after lunch. I don’t do it despite what my dentist no doubt recommended at some point, but I see no problem with it. I do have difficulty believing that there are people in the world who lack sufficient time or inclination to dedicate separate periods of time to each activity, especially at the office.

Now, go back to work Al. You still have many things to accomplish.

As I was about to leave the grocery yesterday, I walked past a women with long hair. She was loading groceries into her car’s trunk and talking as if she were in the middle of a conversation. She looked at me as I walked past and kept talking. I was puzzled and all. I even gestured with a question, “me?”. She didn’t care to respond. Not to me, clearly.

A year or two ago I would have said she was crazy, carrying on a conversation with herself in the middle of a parking lot. That would be a reasonable assumption on my part.

Today it isn’t that simple. Thanks to bluetooth headsets, there’s no way to tell. Not only do people look incredibly stupid walking about with a piece of plastic clipped to their ear, I feel that we’re somehow obligated to expand our benefit-of-the-doubt for crazy people. If you encounter someone in a parking lot who’s looking at you and talking, they could be:

• not crazy, talking to me directly
• not crazy, talking to someone on the phone
• crazy, talking to me directly
• crazy, talking to themselves
• crazy, wearing headset but talking to me directly
• crazy, wearing headset but talking to someone on the phone
• crazy, wearing headset but talking to themselves
• crazy, wearing headset but thinking they’re talking to someone on the phone

It makes my head hurt.

Trying to make sense here.

WTF, Powtangina, Funyeta, Fuck, Sheez, etc…

I’ve been making a conscious effort to cut back on the profanity at work, on my blog, at service crews. Impressionable minds don’t need to listen to my foul mouth and it doesn’t add a whole lot to the conversation. I also think it’s about time I come up with some new adjectives and adverbs to use, all while reserving profanity for times when I really want to get my point across or hurt someone’s feelings. While I adjust, I anticipate a lot of prancing about screaming “fu fu fu” at the top of my lungs. It’s a process, I tell you.

So what do I do when I hear someone talking like his a BIG cono who does not know anything but mag-inarte and magma-feeling? Trust me, I heard a lot. “Paano kung…”, “Bakit kailangan mag-ganito…”, “Mahirap ba yon?…”, “Kaya ko ba ‘yon?…”, etc, echosera, puro ka-artehan, puro ka-plastikan…

Pownyeta! I thought matalino ka? and please, you don’t look like you came from the family of the Royals of Brunei who are being carried avoiding earth to touch their pinkish soles, fed on golden plates and bathe on milk and honey.

You were born with the mountains, crowing roosters, sinangag na kanin and poverty surrounding you. I believe you also have a TV or at least read some books right? It’s a simple thing. Doesn’t need a genius to know. So please spare my ears from your kaartehan.

A long lost, long time “friend” just buzzed me earlier. I saw your Baguio pics, ang gaganda! Punta ulit tayo pag balik ko diyan Pinas ha. Miss you!

Scouting out good restaurants in advance is always a smart bet when you’re visiting other cities, even when it’s close to home. And it can be especially tough to ferret out good recommendations for midsize cities, as so much of the food-finding energy is focused on bigger places. That said, I usually just scout around and ask the locals, taxi drivers mostly.

Experiencing Baguio will not be complete without their unique SM Baguio. Experiencing SM Baguio will not be complete without a taste of Balconaje Bistro Cafe. My first time there was with my then bf-Chris. He and I were going to have a late lunch after a tiring walk along Burnham. I wanted to go to a restaurant that is unique to Baguio City – a place I won’t find in Metro Manila. So, we came upon Balconaje and decided to dine there.

At first, I thought they served local dishes, because of the furnishings and decor that have Baguio City written all over it – the wooden chairs and tables, the bamboo adornments, etc. I was surprised that they offer international dishes, instead. Still, we went ahead and tried their “specialties”.

It has always been an exciting experience to dine out and ask for the place’s best sellers. I have always been tagged as makulit when it comes to asking such. I would usually get away by saying, I’m just trying to get my money’s worth.

Remembering Mami Chus Chicken Cordon Bleu, I decided to give it a try. Chicken Cordon Bleu - which is a big roll of breaded and fried chicken breast filled with ham and cheese and smothered with creamy sauce. Chris picked their Hunter’s Chicken, which is chicken breast with some kind of tomato sauce with mushrooms and onions.

After our orders were served, the sound of utensils touching our plates, glasses being filled with water were the ones left to my hearing. Both dishes were great! The Cordon Bleu, can feed two people. I love the breading that they used – perfectly fried, not burnt. The smooth cheese sauce had just the right amount of salt and the dried basil cut the creaminess of the sauce and gave the whole dish a good sprinkle of spice. The sauce of the Hunter’s Chicken did it for the dish. With that hint of red wine [if I’m not mistaken], the sweetness of the onion, and the big mushroom buttons, just the sauce itself and the rice can be a complete meal for me.

Pictures below show us with Carla [our Baguio based friend] and her friend chismissed as her partner [hahaha].

I would definitely recommend this for you and your family or friends. The food here is inexpensive and delicious. A really great discovery for me, my then-bf, and our tummies!

I want Chinese food. I’m just in the area, can you join me for a quick bite? Mwah! *H_Hon_Sungit - via SMS

That made me jump to my feet. Finding authentic Chinese cuisine in Manila is not necessarily a dificult task. with the fairly large population of Chinese Filipinos in the country, there are many places to go for food that is comfortably familiar. I remembered Jc, Kiko, Ralf, Jay, Agatha and I having a great time at Mr. Choi. I then suggested the same. It’s an updated looking Chinese restaurant. The clean lines, paneled walls, and warm yellow lighting set the ambiance. The place uses black and red for the interiors. Service is brisk. Food always prepared upon ordering.

The cliche restaurant name aside, this is a good place to go to for a casual dinner.

On the Table

• Chips with sesame seed and seaweed [priceless- nice pica pica to nibble on while waiting for the things you ordered].
• Though the tables were a bit small, the setting was neat and tidy.
• We ordered our regulars when eating out at Chinese restaurants… the Yang Chow fried rice, steamed fish, the fried chicken, the crispy squid, and of course, the house pancit!
• We tried some interesting items on the menu like their spinach soup and their mushrooms with tofu.
• The ambiance and the service were good. The price was even better. As for the food, it wasn’t bad. But we had better gustatory experiences elsewhere.

I personally enjoyed their eggplant with ground pork and palm sauce. Soft peeled eggplant… ground pork nicely marinated… flavored by the sauce made from palm sugar… with the right amount of heat. Now I’m missing OJ’s restaurant at Libis. Sigh. I miss Mami Cez, Dian, Joanne, Denden, Gen, Inay G, Mikee, Len, Bernie, and all my friends from WSI.

All the dishes are meant for sharing.. good for 3 to 4 persons. Good thing he invited 3 of his girl friends to comeover so we didn’t have to be burdened by eating them all. What I like about this place is that service is quick. Food is hot. Prices are affordale. This place will always be an option when looking for a place to eat in Robinsons Mall.

“Sa Robinson’s lang ba meron nito? Para siyang imitation ng Gloria Maris ‘no?”, I agreed.

Earlier, Z YM-d me about a post Benjay made. Makaka-relate daw ako. It was about “Love is lovelier the second time around” or “would you still accept your ex if he/she comes back?”

Im in a shaky relationship now and another one would like to get back [haba hair]. The post really hit me straight that I decided to make a response comment.

SERIOUSLY? :
To me, most break ups are for a reason, right? You don’t just break up because it’s cloudy outside one day, and sunny the next? You have a legitimate reason for the break ups.

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes you can reconcile your differences and get back together, but most of the time you should move on with your life. You had some good times, and now either one or both of you has moved on.

LANDI-LY? :
I’ll give it an FB chance… = )

I was watching a show at my sister’s last month called “The Ex Factor”, and it was all about creating drama in seeing if two exs should get back together. All the while, their current boyfriend or girlfriend is watching the entire thing. This is a show, seriously? While I admit that I had a hard time changing the channel, most of the time it was purely the drama of it all that I enjoyed watching. As many of us do.

If You Really Do Want to Rethink Your Break Up

Here are some things to think about when you are thinking about rekindling an old flame:

• Why did you break up in the first place? [This is the main factor, did he/she cheat on you? did you fight all the time? you didn't communicate well? All of these are good reasons NOT to get back together]
• Do you only want them because you can’t have them?
• Do you think that they are the best person for you?
• What did your friends think of him/her? While your friends don’t have the end all be all opinion, they know you well and have your best interests at heart, so you should probably hear their opinion too.
• Why do you really want to get back together?

Be reasonable when you think about these questions. Let your head catch up with your heart. You will make the right decision for you.

Midnight gettin uptight where are you
You said youd meet me now its quarter to two
I know Im hangin but Im still wantin you

Hey jack its a fact theyre talkin in town
I turn my back and youre messin around
Im not really jealous dont like lookin like a clown

I think of you evry night and day
You took my heart then you took my pride away

I hate myself for loving you
Cant break free from the the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you thats why
I hate myself for loving you

Daylight spent the night without you
But Ive been dreamin bout the lovin you do
I wont be as angry bout the hell you put me through

Hey man bet you can treat me right
You just dont know what you was missin last night
I wanna see your face and say forget it just from spite

I hate myself for loving you
Cant break free from the the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you, thats why
I hate myself for loving you

I hate myself for loving you
Cant break free from the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you thats why
I hate myself for loving you

I think of you evry night and day
You took my heart then you took my pride away

I hate myself for loving you
Cant break free from the the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you thats why
I hate myself for loving you
I hate myself for loving you
I hate myself for loving you

Clap, clap, clap, clap!!! Perfect, juuussstt perfect!

Last night, a friend confided his problems to me. I saw his burden and how hurt he really is. I have lot of my own but I thought it wouldn’t be healthy if we’ll both put ourselves 6 feet under frustrations. They have been a good couple for quite sometime already but seems like the other one doesn’t even know how to accept his mistakes or at least recognize one. I have witnessed it myself so I told him to talk to his guy and tell him how he feels about being always the one to say sorry. I know people who really couldn’t accept mistakes. I don’t know if they had placed themselves in high pedestals that they couldn’t reach it even themselves. I also have one from my department who wouldn’t even let you talk or explain things for clarifications. He would just raise his voice, talk like there’s no tomorrow or just storm out his way. [pangalanan na kung sino 'yang mga 'yan! har har har]

I don’t know what’s wrong with these kind people. One thing I have noticed, they have a problem about self image and being conceited.

“SORRY?” No way! It’s against my reputation. I’ve never said sorry to anyone and never will.”

Do you think like this? or do you apologize for the mistake you have caused? In which category you belong to?

We all make mistakes and No one can get away without making mistakes. Sometimes, we make such mistakes that hurt others and we were unable to revert it. The only thing that is going to make you feel comfortable inside your heart is to make it up with a single word SORRY and you are sooner or later forgiven for your blunder. Love means having to say sorry. There is no big and small person to whom you say sorry.You won’t be humiliated if you say sorry for the mistake made by you… It will make your relationship with anyone long-lasting. Never hesitate to accept your mistake and apologize before the situation gets worst. Feel good, not bad to apologize.

So please, say sorry. You have to.

This entry has been on my draft page for quite sometime already. For some reason I really don’t understand, It remained unpublished. Good thing H asked me out last Sunday. So i’ll just post first the “draft” okay?

I love big action popcorn flicks. You know, movies where you go for two hours to unwind and forget about everything. I really dig good military and Sci Fi. Well, today I was browsing around and found a link to an independent film entitled Mutant Chronicles. When I saw the title, I thought, “Great…another mutant and/or walking dead horror film.” I don’t really love horror films but maybe this one could pass. Well, I visited the link out of curiosity and waited for the train wreck. Oh my. Not what I expected.

This one is a combination of Sci Fi and military! The beginning looks like a WWI film. No really, trench warfare and those little round hats. We later see flying ships and huge steampunk looking guns. So who are the stars? Thomas Jane from the first Punisher film and Hell Boy himself, Ron Pearlman. Of course some of you probably know him by his more famous role from Quest for Fire [yeah, right]. This one has all the makings of one great flick. Not sure when it will be released but will be keeping an eye on it. Use the link below to see the entire glorious trailer. I’m telling you folks, this one looks good. What do you think? Leave us your comments on the trailer and don’t hold back the conjectures!

I don’t know if it was because I was so tired and sleepy but I really just slept the whole time. H was so pissed that he was left alone watching it a I snored to great heavens. So sweet of him that he bought a pirated DVD for me to watch so that I’ll have something to write here. I might try to write a review but I don’t think it I’ll be giving it a passing grade. He didn’t like it though.

Yesterday, as I supermanly [faster than the bullet] make my way to work, I passed by Megamall and unintentionally bumped into a very thin lady. She was so thin and all. I immediately said sorry and helped her be at her feet. She was so nice and said “It’s okay” but I know she wasn’t.

I can’t help but to still feel a little weird seeing someone so thin. I can’t still hold my laughter everytime I remember the incident. It’s bad. I know.

Okay - so I was perusing my google finds, my secret link to all fun pics, quotes, and moving craziness, and I came across this pictures. Scary.

Those of you who know me know that I’m not a small one [pun intended]. In fact, I’m bigger [another FUN intended], though I like to think I carry it well. My weight fluctuates depending on the time of the year, and depending on my depression level. I’ll admit it - I eat when I’m depressed, and unfortunately, when I’m bored. That explains why I’ve been eating a lot these days. It’s not a good thing, but I’m a DARN good pancit canton cook when I want to be, and I won’t deny myself the loveliness that comes from my kitchen.

My issue is that I don’t exercise enough. I actually had this conversation recently. If I could get my lazy arse to the gym, or up at an early enough hour to actually do some cardio damage, I could be in good shape again. I’ve done it before, and actually enjoy it, but I’m not very motivated at this point in my life to get out and do it. I want to, and I know I should, but I haven’t made it a priority. Why is that? All the television shows, magazines, movies and internet advertisements have pictures of hunky, sexy bodied, in-shape men displayed in every way, shape and manner, but yet, I am not doing my best to assimilate.

Am I trying to be anti-establishment? Am I a rebel? Sure. That, and I’m just lazy, darn it. I guess I have to change that. I will keep you updated on my progress. Monday will start a new hell - I will wake up earlier and walk or hit the gym again. I’ll have to let you know how that goes. Ugh.

I have not been able to update because of being sooo busy at work. For this weekend, I’ve been really productive.

I started reading The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini on Friday night. I felt some “me time” would be a good thing; lately movies have been my thing [27 dresses, that Sarah and John Lloyd thing, Marimar and Serio's, Iron Man], but I’m always bitching about how I haven’t any time to read anymore. So I’m glad I made time to. It definitely isn’t light reading, but the story was compelling and the writing itself was good and I enjoyed it. So much that I couldn’t put it down, finishing around 2:30 Monday morning.

I slept for 8 hours.

I asked Yaya to cook one pound of bacon, both in the oven and in the skillet. Haven’t-never baked bacon before, I must say it was really easy. No mess or spattering fat, plus you can fit a lot of bacon on a cookie sheet. The house still smells fantastic. The skillet bacon will end up in turkey sandwiches this week for lunch. The baked bacon [that just sounds weird, “baked bacon”] was chopped up and was included in two mini-batches of mega tots [that is, mega fries but with tater tots instead of fries] destined for two different BBQ’s on Sunday. Just a taste of pagmama-feeling mayaman as I put it.

I bought another DVD rack. This makes more room on the bookshelf for books. This is a project I’d been meaning to tackle for some number of months, but never got around to. This morning I saw the stack of books at the top of the stairs that had been there collecting dust and said to myself, “that’s it!” An hour later, I had a new shelving unit. Anyone who has lived with me for any duration of time could attest to my affinity towards homemade wooden furniture. It may not be classy, but it’s functional. I like functional.

Despite some thorough preparation, attempts to make-peace-and-love to my H failed. I’m starting to feel numb about the fight again. I hope I can still stand it. I hope I can still be patient.

I finally got the chance to buy Heroes Season 3 and Smallville Season 8 - the complete season. Next will be Lost, Supernaturals, Prison Break, Greys Anatomy, One Tree Hill, QAF and all other series that I haven’t been able to finish. Simply amazing.

I caught up on all of my magazine subscriptions. Still need to get that copy Yes!, FHM, Cosmo, Him, etc. Caught up with Emman, Nates and Rain also during the latter’s birthday.

I napped. A lot.

I attempted a nice afternoon BBQ and got to see progress on a fellow blogger’s home. Also attended a birthday party at Caloocan, dinner wid new friends, coffee at Tagaytay and some nice conversations with AL [yes! his name is Al - a new friend].

I’m so glad that the weather held out.

My good friend’s cute little baby is celebrating his birthday this Sunday. I was tasked [hahaha] to do the tarpaulin and the invitation cards. Here they are!

My good friend’s cute little baby is celebrating his birthday this Sunday. I was tasked [hahaha] to do the tarpaulin and the invitation cards. Here they are!

I have been pondering about life the whole weekend. I went out with friends, attended parties, met new people, finished my DVD marathon, cooked pasta, and enjoyed life to it’s fullest. Many things happened, heart issues took its toll also but nothing answered my “hello? “.

I had taken time to think things over. Many people have been struggling to prove their worth as a person, many chose to exert so much to please the wandering eyes and many chose to waste time proving how they can score. Just earlier, I realized… What if life isn’t all bout it?

Yes, life isn’t about keeping score…

It’s not about how many friends you have. Or how many people called you. Or how accepted or unaccepted you are. Not about if you have plans for the weekend. Or if you’re alone. It isn’t about who you’re dating, who you use to date, how many people you’ve dated, or if you haven’t been with anyone at all. It isn’t about who you have kissed. It’s not about sex. It isn’t about who your family is or how much money they have. Or what kind of car you drive. Or where you’re sent to school.

It’s not about how beautiful or ugly you are. Or what clothes you wear, what shoes you have on, or what kind of music you listen to. It’s not about if your hair is blonde, red, black, brown, or green. Or if your skin is too light or too dark.

It’s not about what grades you get, how smart you are, how smart everyone else thinks you are, or how smart standardized tests say you are. Or if this teacher likes you, or if this guy/girl likes you. Or what clubs you’re in, or how good you are at “your” sport. It’s not about representing your whole being on a piece of paper and seeing who will “accept the written you”.

But life IS about who you love and who you hurt. It’s about who you make happy or unhappy purposefully. It’s about keeping or betraying trust. It’s about friendship, used as sanctity, or as a weapon. It’s about what you say and mean, maybe hurtful, maybe heartening. About starting rumors and contributing to petty gossip. It’s about what judgments you pass and why. And who your judgments are spread to.

It’s about who you’ve ignored with full control and intention. It’s about jealousy, fear, pain, ignorance, and revenge. It’s about carrying inner hate and love, letting it grow and spreading it.

But most of all, it’s about using your life to touch or poison other people’s hearts in such a way that could never have occurred alone.

Only YOU choose the way these hearts are affected and THOSE choices are what life is all about.

File this under “activities that are nothing more than a timesuck”. For a long time I fought getting involved with Facebook. I have seen friends and officemates opening their accounts there. I have been lured activating my Multiply because my officemater prefer to read my blog entries there instead of opening wordpress. I obliged but opening another networking site didn’t really come into my mind. I didn’t see it as offering any particular advantages and figured that I had enough ways to waste time without engaging in a new activity.

And then one day I woke up and discovered that I had not one, but two Facebook accounts. It wasn’t quite as shocking as Gregor Samsa had in Metamorphosis, which is good because who wants to discover that they are a giant cockroach anyway.

On a sidenote I remember this teacher from elementary who used to pronounce it as cock-A-roach. I can still hear that guy spitting it out with the emphasis on the middle. I think that he thought that it was a safe way to try and belittle students. Believe you me, if he called you a cock-A-roach he was none too happy with you. One of these days I have to share the story of the time we filled his classroom with his favorite curse word, but I digress.

I created a Facebook account as a sort of test. I had decided that I wanted to check it out, but I didn’t want to put a lot of effort into it. So I created one using a fake name and took the thing out for a spin.

For a short while it was mildly interesting. I was poked and poked back, threw sheep at people and tried to remember to duck when they threw them at me. And then one day I decided that I just didn’t need it, so I nuked it. Goodbye Facebook.

I didn’t think twice about it until I heard from a few real world friends. They told me about how they had used it to network and to reconnect with some mutual old friends and encouraged me to open up a new Facebook account. That got me thinking about it, but it wasn’t until my sister asked me to that I gave in to the madness again.

So once again I opened up an account only this time I used my real name and was surprised at how many people found me. In a short time I had a ridiculous number of friends. Some of them were people that I really consider friends and some were acquaintances. I kind of wondered if some of them were more interested in collecting vast numbers of friends than if they really wanted to reconnect with me.

But in truth I didn’t care all that much as it didn’t take any more time so what did it matter. And in reality I did find that it was an easy way to get back in touch with some old friends. We are scattered all over the country and the world so it is easier to drop a quick note on their wall or send a message than to call.

Anyway, that is enough for now. Time for shuteye for this grumpy and problematic man. I’ll get up in 3 hours to meet my bf. Night from the Philippines.