This Blog is an outlet for the random thoughts of an amateur opinionator.
What's an opinionator?
An opinionator is somebody who has power without responsibility, and the ability to spout off on any subject without worrying too much about the consequences of what comes out of the mouth. All you need is an opinion and the opportunity to voice it.
TV is full of professional opinionators. The internet gives the amateur his chance.
> my oPiniOn : my bLog
Author: aLmich
I grew up to be a little bit on the opinionated side, and for the past years I have been writing my own thoughts here, so you can bet I have heard and participated in a lot of debates about whether it is right and/or effective to evangelize to gain more “converts” or not.
The evangelism [for religion, relationships, personal musings or anything else] usually comes from good intentions. Although sometimes it can feel to the person being evangelized to that the intention is more “I’m right, and you’re wrong, and you’d better see things my way”; the intention is usually more, “I didn’t realize what I was missing until I saw this, so I want you to see it too.”
I have an entry here which gained attention from somebody who has comprehension problems. I wrote about “longka/longkatuts/house helpers” and how I see them and how I think they should be treated. My intention is to give my gratitude and to suggest how WE can improve our relationship with them. But this certain person who obviously cannot understand what I really intend to say took it the other way around. I don’t know if she’s a “longka” or just somebody who happens to have so little brain to understand what I really meant. I really feel bad for her. I can’t understand her argument but I’m still giving her the benefit of the doubt.
I was an argumentative child and adolescent, and even though I thought I had some pretty good arguments, logic, and examples, there were few arguments I ever won or lost. Pretty soon I realized that arguments for the purposes of convincing someone to adopt a new outlook or change her mind are a waste of time. Arguments as intellectual exercises or fun pastimes are fine. And you can sometimes bully someone into giving up fighting you, but you haven’t really changed her mind. You’ve just intimidated her.
So if you’re someone who truly thinks “I didn’t realize what I was missing until I had this” instead of “Haha! I’m right and you’re wrong”; think about the last time you changed your mind on an issue or decided to try something new. What was the impetus for that change? Was it someone arguing with you? How did you start seeing things in a different way or open yourself up to trying a new product or lifestyle?
For me [I won’t even try to speak for anyone else] — whether it was my outlooks on race and gender, my choice of handling a relationship, or my beliefs in life — any time I opened myself up to something new or changed my mind, it had nothing to do with getting into arguments with people. In fact, when folks argued with me, I tended to cling more strongly to the familiar than to open myself up to something new.
I change my mind or embrace something new when I come to it instead of it coming to me. I need the resources to come to, of course, but I need to come to those resources. I don’t want someone knocking on my door trying to sell me something. I don’t want a friend pestering me to switch to something or to change my mind about something. I do want, however, many books and websites available on the topic. I want the pros and cons clearly laid out in as unbiased a fashion as is humanly possible.
Thus, in the spirit of the golden rule, I’m going to do unto others as I would have them do unto me. I will write my opinions and leave them here as a resource. If you disagree with me, I don’t want to get into a futile argument with you. You can lay out your own opinions, and I will read them when I am free to read them. You can also read my opinions when you’re free to read them.
