ramblings, random musings, fascinations, rants, raves and revelations

This one is actually the supposed new graphic header of this blog. For some reason, I'm still having trouble uploading. I don't know why. Not a part of the party layouts of course .

This would be the ticket for the party, for the food, drinks and entrance. Serves as the raffle stub too.

This would be the image that will be part of the stage design.

This is only the draft for the redcarpet background ala Awards Night.

This is one of the teasers for the party posted along the corridors of the office.

I'm wearing my thinking cap again. And my inner demons have taken a break from all the naggings and pressuring they've been putting me through these couple of days --- weeks, come to think of it

Today's a Saturday. That makes tomorrow Sunday, church day! --- what else?

So I've decided to make quick turnabout insofar as my personal sentiments are concerned, whether self-induced or caused by some external, foreign influence. I've decided to devote the main column of this blog ONLY to positive, "happy" entries. The other, less enthusiastic ones I will put on the sideblog. Meaning, they'll both be brief and even more vague than they already are. My apologies to those who attempt to make sense out of them. If any.

I just received a comment from one of my entries. The person might be hiding his [assuming na HE siya] identity but I'm just thankful he's been reading this blog. I understand him. I mean from his standpoint and from all he heard, what do you think would be his side? Maybe he has not been victimized yet or maybe he just doesn't know. I don't know. But just like what I've said, I'm okay now. Whatever happened before were all rested on HIS judgment. I don't feel that bad about that person anymore anyway. Afterall, that person has been my friend. I'm just exploring my freedom to write.

Anyone who comes across this blog, I want him or her to feel only positive vibes. No. It's not censorship. It's not being un-true to one's self. As I've explained, nothing's being hidden or removed. Only relocated. Far more than an attempt to appease any blog-hopper or reader, it's more of a therapeutic exercise for me. Maybe by trying to highlight more the better aspects of life, I too would follow suit and adopt the same philosophy which this blog shall now incorporate in its electronic "paginas". Hopefully.

With that, I shall now look for those elusive "feel-good" thoughts.
Good luck to me!

Three of the biggest coffee chains in the Metro have been going head to head with their Christmas Planner Giveaway. Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf is giving out a notebook [*available in 3 designs], Starbucks Coffee is giving out a planner [*leather bound with pencil] while Seattle's Best Coffee is giving out a tote bag, notebook, mug, ball pen, gift coupons and metal casing [*kitchen sink not included hehehe]. Here's a quick guide on the three Holiday promos.

If only there were more sincere people out there I might actually rethink my philosophy in life, which is that: every person's a jerk until proven otherwise.

Yeah, I know it's such a harsh picture of reality that I'm painting for myself. Completely unhealthy and anti-social. But no matter how I hard to look at it from a different angle, another point of view, I keep ending up with the same pessimistic attitude.

It could be that I've been traumatized far too many times in the past, from situations wherein the people I trusted the most turned out to be the ones who hurt me in the worst kind of way possible. In short, best friends turned biggest assholes. I use the term friend here in the generic sense [It could refer to friends literally, acquaintances, even relatives].

During those times, I was always completely caught unprepared. Who wouldn't be? There was once a saying, "Against an enemy I can myself defend. But heaven protect me from a blundering friend." I cannot find anything more accurate than that.

Now I have new friends. I have Gretch, Nikki, Kate, Myah, Ryan, Ron, Rhon, JC, Sir Pauly, Sir Ferdz, Eddan, SQ pipol, HR pipol, Superpages pipol, Brooke, Dianna, Digisign pipol, iPrint pipol and a lot more. Who blunders? I don't know.

It's so sad how those what you thought to be your friends turned to be a snake ready to bite you dead. I've experienced those... trust me. I had Rien as a very-well-loved-and-treasured-friend and yet she bit me. So as Farrah [*good thing we managed to reclaim the friendship] and now the same thing is happening to Ryan and Gretch [With these I meant both having trouble with each other... Ryan and Gretch are mortal enemies now and we, their friends couldn't do anything but mumble our words].Why do you have to forget the friendship? Why say I don't need you in life? Why destroy everything? Why be drowned by the attention?
But then, shouldn't we be able to distinguish these persons from the rest? Why take it against the world, simply for the actions of quite a few? I can offer no sound justification.

It's a sad fact. I befuddle even myself.

Today, I live in a very jaded world, painted in all-black. It's not a very happy place to be in, I tell you. There are not enough words for me to express how much I'd like to move away from it. But my inner demons seem to always prevail.

It also doesn't help that I still meet these fake people I despise every now and then. They just reaffirm my personal beliefs. No matter how skewed. No matter how flawed.
It's kinda funny though how I slowly end up becoming the people I hate the most...
Sighs all over the place.

If only had the insight to look deeper into people --- and find the tiniest bit of good, even in the most evil person around. Maybe I would be a whole lot better. A better person. A better man.
That is, if only.

Because I've never been the better man.

Sad but true.

Alas. I cannot think of any. So I am giving up... for now. For today, that is.

I've been browsing over all these different blogs across the internet superhighway, and I'm amazed at how exciting and colorful other people's lives must be. Yhey have all these stories, these daily encounters with the interesting kind. Hence, no problem as to what to write down on to their blogs, whatsoever.

I kept wondering why I could not experience that same ease; why I could not have this treasure-filled chest of anecdotes and what-have-you's. Then it struck me.

A great majority of all these people whose sites I found rather interesting, had really cool jobs. One would either be a writer, a photographer or an artist. Man, their jobs kick ass. No wonder they get to engage in all these fulfilling episodes.

Whereas I am stuck in this call center environment. Some people may find that exciting. Some may find time for exciting things, [de]spite of being in a call center. I don't really understand it. Whenever someone would ask me where am I working, I always have this second thought of saying the bleep [*callcenter] word. I hate those who would bravely go and stand sa stage specially sa comedy bars tapos mag-iingles kse daw taga callcenter siya [*nyeta!]. I know there's nothing to be ashamed of, but that just doesn't work for me I guess.

At least not yet.

That's why I'm either gonna have to wait for 2 years more or so, before I am able to do the things I really want to. Or by some stroke of luck, I too would be fortunate enough to find some color in this place, maybe on another job.

There. That's the most "positive" way I can think of to describe the way things are for me. Right here. Right now.

Happy Holidays!